Identification: Around 18 inches long, black feathers with white under the wings, white stripes on the neck, and a pointed red crest. The males also have a red mustache.
The Pileated Woodpecker; an Exceptional Bird.
All woodpeckers are nice. There's something quaintly endearing about smacking one's face into a tree day in and day out. Furthermore, they tend to be presentable birds, donning various combinations of black, white, and red feathers to good effect. True, some add yellows and browns, but always tastefully. Of these already likable avifauna, the pileated is the stand out specimen. His size alone sets him apart from others, and his brilliant red crest provides an easily recognized mark of distinction.
Outwitting the Fates
If my theory is to be believed, the pileated woodpecker should not even exist. Perhaps I'm getting ahead of myself. To better support this bold claim, I'll provide some background.
After a life spent familiarizing oneself with the natural world, it often follows that one develops not only a deep reservoir of factual knowledge, but also some ideas about the underlying trends, patterns, or rules shaping the universe. Newton discovered gravity. Darwin helped launch the much maligned theory of evolution.
Although I'm no Darwin, I have made a few observations about one peculiar pattern that seems to hold sway in the animal kingdom. It goes something like this:
After a life spent familiarizing oneself with the natural world, it often follows that one develops not only a deep reservoir of factual knowledge, but also some ideas about the underlying trends, patterns, or rules shaping the universe. Newton discovered gravity. Darwin helped launch the much maligned theory of evolution.
Although I'm no Darwin, I have made a few observations about one peculiar pattern that seems to hold sway in the animal kingdom. It goes something like this:
The more interesting a species, the greater its probability of being extinct.
It's true, the natural inclination is to dismiss this as a facile platitude. Does blue whale not chug along in the depths? Are not the sloths in the trees? Does chubby nerpa not cheerfully navigate the cool waters of Lake Baikal? Please, carefully consider my arguement, and do not let these colorful outliers becloud your judgement. Consider:
Animal Status
Tyrannosaurus Rex: Extinct
Giant Sloth: Extinct
The Dodo: Extinct
Giant Wombat: Extinct
Marsupial Lion: Extinct
Elephant Bird: Extinct
Triceratops: Extinct
Megalodon: Extinct
Saber Tooth Tiger: Extinct
Flesh Eating Kangaroos: Extinct
Sphinx: Extinct/Never existed
I do not wish to belabor the point. My gist is this; a reasonable man should no more expect to see a giant woodpecker with a blazing crest allight on the branches of the temperate deciduous forest, than he should have to worry about velociraptors devouring his young. Yet the pileated woodpecker persists. How is this? I will tell you. Although magnificent, the pileated is nonetheless the drab cousin of two more flamboyant woodpeckers. The raven sized Imperial Woodpecker dwarfed his pileated brethren for centuries before departing this world for good. The Ivory-billed woodpecker outdid the pileated in size, striking plumage and elegance of beak. If he has not yet vanished from the North American forests, his continued existence is certainly far more precarious than that of the pileated. Thus the pileated woodpecker has managed to escape so far the cruel wrath of mother nature, who hews her fairest children that they might not too long stand above the rest in a very mixed perhaps unworkable metaphorical sense.
Numbers alone have been in his favor. Had he not been blessed with two more glorious cousins to slake the jealous appetite of wondrous Nature who suffers not the exquisite to dwell long on the earth, he too would surely have met his end. For now, the day of reckoning is delayed.
Animal Status
Tyrannosaurus Rex: Extinct
Giant Sloth: Extinct
The Dodo: Extinct
Giant Wombat: Extinct
Marsupial Lion: Extinct
Elephant Bird: Extinct
Triceratops: Extinct
Megalodon: Extinct
Saber Tooth Tiger: Extinct
Flesh Eating Kangaroos: Extinct
Sphinx: Extinct/Never existed
I do not wish to belabor the point. My gist is this; a reasonable man should no more expect to see a giant woodpecker with a blazing crest allight on the branches of the temperate deciduous forest, than he should have to worry about velociraptors devouring his young. Yet the pileated woodpecker persists. How is this? I will tell you. Although magnificent, the pileated is nonetheless the drab cousin of two more flamboyant woodpeckers. The raven sized Imperial Woodpecker dwarfed his pileated brethren for centuries before departing this world for good. The Ivory-billed woodpecker outdid the pileated in size, striking plumage and elegance of beak. If he has not yet vanished from the North American forests, his continued existence is certainly far more precarious than that of the pileated. Thus the pileated woodpecker has managed to escape so far the cruel wrath of mother nature, who hews her fairest children that they might not too long stand above the rest in a very mixed perhaps unworkable metaphorical sense.
Numbers alone have been in his favor. Had he not been blessed with two more glorious cousins to slake the jealous appetite of wondrous Nature who suffers not the exquisite to dwell long on the earth, he too would surely have met his end. For now, the day of reckoning is delayed.
In General
Although these higher truths should always be the end of our inquiries, one does well to master the more trivial information pertaining to any beast, tedious as this may seem. The pileated woodpecker loves to eat ants. He bores massive holes. He prefers older taller trees, and can often be spotted with his mate. A true gentleman, he mates for life. He is particularly at risk from larger owls, and destruction of habitat. On Christmas Eve he can speak in the tongues of man.*
*not yet confirmed by scientific observation.
Although these higher truths should always be the end of our inquiries, one does well to master the more trivial information pertaining to any beast, tedious as this may seem. The pileated woodpecker loves to eat ants. He bores massive holes. He prefers older taller trees, and can often be spotted with his mate. A true gentleman, he mates for life. He is particularly at risk from larger owls, and destruction of habitat. On Christmas Eve he can speak in the tongues of man.*
*not yet confirmed by scientific observation.
Posts
